So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Company sent me first class out of state, got so drunk on the plane I started handing out pillows and blankets to the people in coach
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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