wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
