But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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