Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
i fell asleep on him beating off on webcam last night, i'm such a great boyfriend.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Not much, really baked..... beethoven is AMAZING it's like i'm flying in space with baby jesus
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
Randomize
