Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
I think I'm the first girl to break a bed with a guy, without even having sex with him while doing so.
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