While sitting in bed naked eating ramen and watching the colbert report I realize why random sex happens.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
My final act is to send you this message. I love you. Tell my family that I love them. Except my dad. Tell him I said "Eh..." while rocking your hand side to side. And tell Tim that I will always love the idea of him. Tell Caleb I love him so. Take care of Miss Kitty Fantastico. Tell the world that I will watch over. Good bye. I love you.
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
By the way, just opened the browser on my phone for the first time today... And it was it the "images" section of "who invented ass fucking"
So thanks for that
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I will never look at a penis the same again. After that I will appreciate them so much more than I do. Makes me wanna kiss yours just for being pretty
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
Can you please stop having such an active social life? I'm tryna get fucked over here
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