So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
Snorting lines of xanex off the back of my grandparents toilet before church. Thinking of u.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
I say we start a new tradition. I came up with it all by myself. It's called work out, lay out, black out
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
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