i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
he tried breathing fire using moonshine and a roman candle. would not have believed it unless i actually witnessed it.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Boobs speak an international language.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
After the Jell-o shots and about 6 shots of lighter fluid brand tequila, it got to the point where breathing was painful. All I could do was pray I didn't fall asleep in the front yard.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Wanna buy a dildo with me during your lunch break tomorrow?
QUIT BEING A BITCH, DRINK SOME PEPTO, AND PUKE ON OUR FOES
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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