Saw some pubes in our toilet, hope the new look works out tonight.
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
Randomize