can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
This whole situation could've been avoided if you would've just let me open the beer
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
The Vegas crew is in two groups, Team Vodka and Team Fireball. There is no winner in this.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
