I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
My penis needs a shock collar
Somehow she is more off limits now than when she was his girlfriend
If by some world ending natural disaster I get into an actual relationship with this kid, should I tell him the truth about the web of lies I've based our current relationship on?
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
I couldnt sleep the entire night because her cats kept reaching under the door like they were trying to eat me for taking their place on her bed.
I always knew youd fuck a cat lady
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