if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
so you told her it was a 'nam scar? i mean, how old does she think you are.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
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