My friends, they love my intelligence
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
at that point, I wouldn't blame you because I'd be so ashamed I couldnt even have sex with myself.
Somehow my boobs came up in conversation AGAIN last night and I'm still not getting laid...
So I forgot to ask, how was that bartender you slept with two weeks ago?
Google chlamydia.
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
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