question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
There was blood everywhere. She was pretty good looking person though.
we bought a duck. we're keeping him in our dorm room. don't ever try to tell me you've had a better freshman year than me.
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
