She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Randomize
