its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
Just spit on a sock to clean a spot on my glass table. Oddest combination of so lazy and motivated ever.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
All i remember is you yelling at a stop sign and the rest is a blur
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
I learned a valuable lesson about combining day drinking with malt liquor: you may think you have super powers, but that's just the Steel Reserve talking.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
I think it's a bit on the nose for the Uber driver to play stairway to heaven while driving like A psycho.
Randomize
