Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
My goal is to go an entire semester without cocaine. That's an adult goal right?
This costume is too restrictive. The priest and I cannot get it on while I am wearing it.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
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