So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I think a kid would responsible me up
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
That's the 3rd time in 6 months I woke up on the hallway floor using a towel as a blanket, no clue how I got there. At least back when I was still drinking I could blame something other than myself for that kind of shit.
You should go to AA meetings and warn people about the dangers of sobriety.
Last night you texted me "tqiirkykbg doe freedom always"... why?
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I have no concept of chastity or moderation, she is a Catholic guilt poster child, how could I not try to hit that
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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