Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
Like my Aunt Merial always says ... big dicks, big dicks.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Randomize
