I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
you thought your balls were fighting each other...
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
I felt like I crashed a wedding. Everyone was dressed so nice and I was covered in actual dirt and a little blood.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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