well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
you were crying and trying to give advice to people.. that's was a new level of drunk for you
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
I made out with that lesbian chick for a blunt. NO REGRETS.
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Randomize
