the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
just spent the last 4 hours covering his room in sticky notes. Viva Drunk Thursdays.
I thought i lost my bra, but when i went back to help clean it was hanging up on the wall
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
I have the WORST hangover. Pretty sure my liver fell out while taking a dump. THAT bad.
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
How are you and the lady friend?
Well, she's a lunatic, and I love sex, so we're good.
Randomize