..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Someone just knocked jenga into a plate of cake. I'm licking off each piece one by one.
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
Just woke up from a dream where I had lesbian sex with myself (a clone of me)... Take that, Freud!
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
If you come home to me in lingerie and you start vacuuming...I need to reevaluate my priorities
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize