hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
she walked out and i tried to get her to come back but i couldn't remember her name so i just whistled... future reference: that doesn't work
You know its good night when theres makeup smears on the toilet seat
We ate a mysterious delivered pizza which no one ordered and then the wii wouldn't work so 20 of us watched porn on two laptops. Drunk took the awkward away.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
Most people would probably take his lack of responses as a queue to stop. But nope, not me. I just keep going. And that's why I don't have a bf, just a little weinered friend
cops woke me up on the sidewalk and asked where my shoes are.. fuck if i know, im sleeping on the sidewalk! actually i didnt say that, i just cried until they gave me a ride home.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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