No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
COKE WAS NOT ON THE ITINERARY FOR TONIGHT.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
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