Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
Life hack: hotbox while in the car wash. It'll change your life.
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Randomize
