she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
would it be mean if I put better with the lights off on my sex playlist just for my hook up with him?
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
Randomize
