yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
We've had the 'life would be so much better if we were both lesbians' conversation too much for that to be okay.
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Randomize
