he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
Just had to have the guy at Sprint clear the dried cum out of the trackball on my Blackberry. Wonder if that happens to him often.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
I'm just going to lay in a blanket cocoon of self pity for the next few months.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
my nose is crying tears of wow.
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
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