Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
She kept saying I was her favorite Jonas brother, and for some reason, I was ok with that.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
I'm gonna go drown myself in the shower. Make sure to cover me up before the paramedics arrive. I'm too fat to be seen naked right now.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I just saw a guy walking down the street without a shirt on and holding a samari sword....
Randomize
