she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
I saved $70 from being to drunk to go out last night so I figured I could buy a new watch.
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
it's sad when i round the corner and the dog goes directly for the liquor store
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
Update: That guy is no longer in the restroom, so he's probably not dead.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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