white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
time to smoke my breakfast
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I pretty much just threw a bunch of clothes and my vodka in a bag..idk where I'm gonna end up tonight but I'm prepared.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I mean I'm sad it didn't work out but tbh he he can't unlick my booty hole or unbreak his headboard... He won't forget my name ever
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
He stopped me mid-blow job to say that his new year's resolution was to stop hooking up. MID FUCKING BLOW JOB.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
