maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I can't believe i facilitated a beer for sweater vest deal last night...
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Did you pee in the oven last night??
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