One girl and one boy is just not enough.
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I just need a text that says "put that food down bitch" and then maybe I'll lose water weight through tears
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
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