I bet he comes in French.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
They should make a traveling bouncer service to remove unwanted people from your house without getting the cops involved. That sums up my Friday.
I would really just like to get laid somewhere that's not on a bathroom floor at this point in my life
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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