READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I'm trying not to drink. I may fall down if I move. This is bad. I had everclear before the bar. Oh no. Oh no. Breathe. Breathe. Breathe.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
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