Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
i just smoked marajunia from a shotgun barrell. what have you done today?
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
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