Rock
Scissors
Fuck
I thought Christmas was going to come before I did
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
mom and dad sent me an easter basket full of beer pong supplies again.
Just found my mom passed out in my bed holding a bag of wine. Not sure if I'm ashamed or proud.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
But really- as the voice of your vagina I am BEGGING you to do it. If not for yourself than for your poor innocent puss
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize