You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
it's one of those mornings where you are proud of yourself just for waking up.
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
well.. I tried flushing my sandals down the toilet
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
Randomize
