Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
fuck it. from now on whatever room i wake up in, i'm stealing clothes from. this walk of shame shit is too much without pants
She's going to hate me
Yeah well one of her many personalities always hates you.
The rest will just start to agree
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize
