If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
3 words: harry potter burlesque. My life is so much more awesome than yours right now.
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
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