ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
i went to disney world today with my friends, met snow white, then saw her later at a bar. she is naked next to me in her bed, passwed out. when you wish upon a star...
Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I took out a life ins. policy Thursday. It's okay I can die in Nashville now.
Randomize
