Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
So fucking hammered. Is this all spelled right? I'm holding it up to my eye. I am on a boulder. I feel like an owl
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
Oh. I'm probably going to just get a viagra and ruin your life.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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