Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I KNOW you don't honestly think you can pay me back in lotto tickets.
can you explain why there is a dead rabbit in my front seat?
idk, I had a turtle in mine.
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
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