READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
My mom made me write an apology letter to all my family for hijacking the eggnog.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
One day I'll learn not to get drunk on a plane. Today is not that day.
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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