There's a Cowboys game and a Rangers game on at the same time...talk about Sophie's choice
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
you covered his dog in toothpaste. safe to say hes not gonna call you.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I reek of latex and grilled onions.
Mission accomplished.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
