woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Randomize
