Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
God gave me these boobs for a reason other than for people to throw things down them.
I got you a housewarming gift. It starts with "A" and ends with "bottle of Jameson"
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Ummm so I just found the baby pumpkin that was on my porch last night in Village Pizza this morning on their counter. The cashier said some drunk girl came in and told him it was a present.
More cowboy butts than you can shake a stick at, oh joy.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
