I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
This body was not built to go to the gym. It was built to chain smoke cigarettes and shoot whiskey
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Randomize
