My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
The is a pregnant woman in this Chipolte wearing a shirt that simply says ‘OOPS!’ across the tummy.
That baby is bound to be under-loved.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I lost it last night. That was humiliating. Cincinnati is now covered in my puke.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
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