I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
Peanut butter and whiskey is not a dinner
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize
