My sheets at my parents place are clean. No braveheart but I can paint myself, yell "freedom", and sword fight you with my cock. So come over.
we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
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