i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
At the airport and im So hungover. Think anyone will help if I put a note on me reading "flying to Boston, please wake me as we board" and then passing back out?
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
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